177. Start Gathering The Evidence

There’s so much we overlook when we let our inner critic run the show, focusing only on what went wrong and ignoring all the effort we put in. By intentionally tracking the small wins, gathering evidence of progress, and reclaiming our time, we can start to build the career we actually want instead of the one we think we deserve. It’s time for us to stop waiting for validation and start owning the work we’re doing to move forward.

It's time we shifted from stress to strategy, from rumination to intentional self-improvement, and from fear of judgment to future-proofing our careers with clarity and confidence.

Are you constantly replaying your mistakes while overlooking your daily efforts? Are you waiting for perfect conditions before taking action on your goals? Are you struggling to recognize your own progress in a fast-paced, high-pressure work environment?

You’ll learn that building confidence and career momentum doesn’t come from chasing perfection or waiting for big wins—it comes from consistently noticing and valuing the small steps you take every day. Gathering quiet, tangible proof of your progress is one of the most powerful ways to shift your mindset and future-proof your career.

WHAT YOU WILL DISCOVER

• Why focusing on your effort—not just your outcomes—is essential for building self-trust and career resilience

• 3 practical tips to help you make meaningful progress

• Why reframing your attention toward what’s working helps break the cycle of stress, self-doubt, and burnout

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DOWNLOAD GUIDE TO GATHERING THE PROOF OF YOUR CAPABILITIES

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TRANSCRIPT

Welcome to the Stop Sabotaging Your Success podcast, episode one hundred and seventy-seven. I'm your host Cindy Esliger. This is the podcast focusing on what we can do today to take control of our careers and overcome the inevitable barriers to success that we encounter along the way. 

It's surprisingly easy to fixate on every little misstep – the awkward comment in a meeting, the message you wish you had worded differently, the one thing you forgot on your never-ending to-do list. Meanwhile, the countless small wins, the consistent effort, and the ways you've shown up day after day, barely register. In fast-paced, high-pressure environments, this tendency to minimize our progress while magnifying our mistakes can quietly derail our confidence and stall our momentum. We internalize our setbacks while overlooking the very proof that we're steadily improving and making real progress toward building something meaningful. 

In this episode, we explore how shifting your attention away from self-criticism can help you create a career that's not only sustainable, but future-proof, through intentional, visible effort. That starts with recognizing that momentum is built in the in-between moments: the minutes you reclaim between meetings, the tiny actions you take when no one's watching, and the quiet evidence you gather along the way. When you start tracking effort instead of chasing perfection, everything changes. You realize that success doesn't require burnout or brilliance – it simply requires consistency. And the more you notice and celebrate your progress, the easier it becomes to build on, one small win at a time.

Most of us have an inner critic that's always ready to pounce when we make a mistake, whispering things like, "You should have known better" or the classic, "Who do you think you are?". That voice in my head is relentless and that kind of internal dialogue just runs wild. Over time, we begin to internalize our setbacks, overlook our progress, and sabotage our momentum – not because we no longer have the ambition or drive to succeed, but because we've trained ourselves to focus more on what's missing, rather than what's working.

It's surprisingly easy to keep a mental tally of our shortcomings – every missed deadline, awkward interaction, or less-than-perfect work product. Meanwhile, we seem to forget our wins entirely, even the hard-earned ones. We're the ones keeping score against ourselves, stockpiling our mistakes, while glossing over all the effort we've put in that is actually moving our careers forward. 

If you want to build lasting momentum, you have to stop using your brain as a vault for your failures and start gathering evidence of your progress. It's not about doing everything perfectly, because that will never happen. Spend your time gathering that tangible proof that you're showing up, putting in the effort to learn, grow, and get better, every single day. 

Gathering this proof doesn't have to be one more task on your already overloaded to-do list. In fact, it's much easier than you think, especially if you stop waiting for the perfect moment or the big wins and start noticing the small stuff that's already working, because effort counts. If you showed up, tried something new, figured out a workaround, asked a question, or didn't give up when things got hard, that's progress. That's the evidence you're looking for. 

So, how do you start gathering that proof without it feeling like an overwhelming task? 

Start small. I mean really small. Pick one thing that went well today. Maybe you spoke up in a meeting. Maybe you hit send on a tough email you've been putting off. Maybe you didn't have the energy to be brilliant, but still managed to be present and helpful. That counts. Say it out loud to yourself. Write it down. Add it to a note on your phone or a sticky note on your desk. If you see something, take note of it, especially when that something is a quiet example of your effort, growth, or capability. 

Then, keep going by building a running list of this evidence you're gathering. Fill it with wins, lessons learned, risks taken, and actions that reflect who you're becoming. Don't worry about how impressive they look. You're not building a highlight reel for social media. In fact, you're not building it for anyone other than yourself. You're collecting career fuel. This is what you'll return to when self-doubt creeps in, when imposter syndrome rears its ugly head, or when you need to remind yourself that you're not starting from scratch. This is how you'll build a strong foundation of consistent, meaningful effort that will eventually pay off. 

One of the biggest reasons we struggle to see our own progress is because we've been conditioned to believe that only big, flashy wins matter – like promotions or awards – the things that get public praise. And, when those things don't show up, especially in environments that reward only the loudest voices and tend to overlook the quiet contributions, we assume we must not be doing enough. But, that's a trap that keeps you chasing external validation instead of recognizing the internal strength you're already demonstrating. 

Even worse, while you're waiting for some imaginary benchmark that you're 'enough' to prove your worth, time is slipping by. All those small moments – the ones that you are actually making progress – go unacknowledged, uncelebrated, and unleveraged. 

Stress and overthinking fill in the gaps. You start worrying about that thing you said last week that seemed to make things worse, instead of recognizing how much better you're handling tough situations than you did a year ago. Waiting for perfect conditions just wastes more time, because the perfect time will never come. You've got to work with what you have. 

Time is precious, and yet, we waste it waiting, worrying, or wallowing. We claim we don't have time to work on our goals, and yet, we can spend twenty minutes a day spiraling about something that's beyond our control. That's time you could have used to organize your week, send that networking message, or read two pages of something that feeds your future. Minutes matter, and most of us have more than we think – they're just hiding in plain sight. 

The goal isn't to become some ultra-disciplined productivity robot. It's to become more intentional about doing things that matter, like building your career in a way that feels aligned and achievable. That might mean using the five minutes before your next meeting to update your to-do list, or taking ten minutes during your lunch to capture three wins for the week, or using the time you'd normally scroll through your phone at night to plan tomorrow's priorities. These are hidden minutes that tend to go unnoticed, and when you start applying them to intentional actions, however small, you start building real momentum. 

Over time, something incredible happens. You start to notice how capable you've become. You stop needing other people's validation to believe in your potential. You stop giving your best energy to doubt, fear, or perfectionism. You begin to value your own time so much that you're no longer willing to casually waste it on stress or overthinking. You realize that success isn't found in giant leaps – it's created in the moments you choose to show up, even when you don't feel like it. 

Once you start gathering the evidence of your growth – not perfection, but rather the effort you put in – the next step is to sharpen your focus. Because where your attention goes, your energy follows. Most of us have become experts in spotting what's wrong, broken, or missing. We zoom in on the problems, the obstacles, and the areas where things didn't go exactly as planned. Often, without realizing, we're training our brains to prioritize disappointment over progress. 

This is why paying attention changes everything. 

When you shift your focus towards what's working, even if it's small, messy, or unfinished, you start to build momentum. That one thing that went right, that moment you handled with more grace than you would have six months ago, that counts. Taking note of what's actually working is the mental conditioning that keeps you moving forward, instead of getting stuck in a cycle of self-doubt and frustration. 

A friend of mine once suggested to me to start telling myself, "Everything is always working out for me" instead of my usual negativity. I admit, it seemed corny and unrealistic at first, especially if you're like me and used to bracing yourself for things to fall apart. But, I gave it a chance and it actually seemed to help. So, I invite you to try saying it. Because your brain believes what you feed it, and if you keep reinforcing that things never go your way, what you'll keep noticing is that more things are not going your way.

So, instead, start reinforcing the idea that things tend to work out – not perfectly, but eventually – and your mind will start scanning for proof of that, too. You'll get more of what you pay attention to. 

That means celebrating proof when you see it, not waiting for it to be flawless, impressive, or validated by those around you. The moment something clicks into place, that moment you feel a shift or experience a little win – acknowledge it, celebrate it, even quietly, just to yourself. Because that kind of recognition builds self-trust. It tells your brain this matters, so you'll end up doing more of that. 

Now, of course, I understand that work doesn't pause for your breakthroughs. Personal responsibilities don't conveniently schedule themselves around your career goals. And it's easy to convince yourself that there's no time left to focus on the things that would actually move you forward.

But, as much as you might not think so, the time is there. It's just hiding in plain sight. 

You don't need a three-hour block of uninterrupted time to work on your goals. In fact, that magical block you're waiting for, it probably doesn't exist. And even if it does, you're likely to be so overwhelmed trying to make it 'count' that it ends up going to waste, anyway. Instead, think in minutes. Maybe you have just twenty minutes in the morning, another twenty minutes during lunch, and another twenty minutes before you go to bed. That's sixty minutes each weekday, or five hours a week, without changing anything drastic about your life. 

You can steal back time during those in-between moments – waiting for meetings to start, during your commute, or sitting in a parking lot, or even standing in line. These hidden pockets of time are valuable, yet they're also easy to overlook or squander if you don't have a plan. So, don't leave it to chance. 

Start pre-planning your mini-actions. Think in terms of five, ten, or fifteen minute tasks – small enough to complete quickly, yet meaningful enough to keep you moving forward. In five minutes, you can scan your to-do list and reprioritize. In ten minutes, you can draft a quick email asking for advice or following up on something important. In fifteen minutes, you can read a thought-provoking article or jot down a few notes on a project idea that's been stuck in your head.

These tiny actions may not look like much, but they stack up. And over time, these actions lead to results. You'd be amazed what you can accomplish over time when you use these 'lost' minutes with intention. Now, I'm not saying that you have to be constantly productive. And, let's be clear, you shouldn't be. But, when progress feels slow or unreachable, this is how you take the pressure off and still keep moving forward.

One pitfall to watch out for though, is decision fatigue. It's easy to waste those surprise 'free moments' just trying to figure out what to do with them. That's why having a pre-made list of options is a game-changer. Decide in advance. If you have five minutes, you'll do X. If you have ten or fifteen minutes, you'll do Y. This isn't about cramming tasks into every spare second; it's about being ready when opportunity shows up unannounced.

Of course, progress isn't just about action – it's also about where you're focusing your attention. So, while you're using those hidden minutes to do things that will move you forward, also use them to gather more proof of what's working for you. Notice something small that went well today? Write it down. Received a piece of positive feedback, even if it was just an offhand comment? Capture it. Did you handle something more calmly, with more confidence or clarity than you expected? That counts, too. These moments are your data points – your evidence – and they matter more than you think. 

Keep a running list. Call it your 'proof file', your 'confidence tracker', your 'brag book', whatever feels motivating. Over time, it becomes a resource you can pull from when self-doubt creeps in, or when you need to advocate for yourself in a performance review, a job interview, or just counter the negativity spinning around in your own head. It's also a powerful reminder that you're not stuck, you're progressing, even if that progress isn't immediately obvious to anyone else. 

Just be careful not to take this too far. This isn't about becoming hyper-efficient or squeezing every drop of productivity out of your day. Downtime is still necessary. It's about reclaiming the moments that would otherwise go to mindless scrolling, self-doubt, or unnecessary worry, and using them instead, to support the career and life you're trying to build. Yes, give yourself a break, because time to relax and recharge is important. But, don't pretend you have zero time to do the things that matter. 

At some point, many of us realize that stress has become our default operating system. We spend hours mentally rehashing things we wish we'd said differently, worrying too much about what someone else might think, or obsessing over how we measure up. It can be exhausting, but it's not actually getting us anywhere. It's a distraction disguised as diligence. It's time we shifted from stress to strategy, from rumination to intentional self-improvement, and from fear of judgment to future-proofing our careers with clarity and confidence. 

Often, we mistake busyness for intentionality. When we're overloaded and constantly moving, it can feel like we're doing all the right things, but sometimes, we're just doing everything, without asking if it actually gets us closer to what we want. If we're not careful, we can fall into a trap of over-scheduling, over-committing, and over-delivering, but losing ourselves in the process. Being busy isn't the same as being aligned. One builds anxiety; the other builds traction. Can you see the difference? 

The first step is reclaiming some of your time – not all of it, just enough of it – and redirecting it towards something that actually matters to you. Time is precious, non-renewable, and too valuable to keep spending on stress, regret, or performing for people who don't even notice. So, instead of worrying about what went wrong last week, let it go and replace that time with one small action that moves your goal forward. It doesn't need to be dramatic. Even writing one sentence, sending one message, or reading one article is enough to signal to yourself, this is who I am becoming. It fosters a change in your identity. 

As you do this more consistently, you start to realize something powerful: the tiniest actions done with intention are more effective than the biggest ones done out of panic. Bit by bit, you're building something significant, even if no one else can see it, yet. Especially if no one else can see it, yet. You know the effort you've put in, and that's what you should be proud of.

This is where a lot of us stumble. We've been conditioned to believe that pride is a dirty word, that we shouldn't talk about our accomplishments, especially not too loudly. That being proud of what we've done makes us arrogant, unlikable, or somehow selfish. For many women, especially in male-dominated fields, success can feel dangerous. We're told not to "make anyone uncomfortable". So, we downplay our wins, minimize our growth, and pretend our progress doesn't count, unless someone else says it does.

But pride is not arrogance – it's fuel. Being proud of what you've worked hard for is not bragging. It's what sustains you when external praise is slow to come (or never arrives). It's what reminds you that you're on the right path, even when the path feels steep, lonely, or uncertain. If you don't give yourself that acknowledgement, who will? 

You'll notice that when you focus on effort, not just outcomes, you start to see progress everywhere. You start to trust that your time is being well-spent, even if the results aren't instant. That's because real success isn't about having all the answers today or landing a promotion tomorrow – it's about building momentum, one intentional action at a time. 

Over time, this effort you've put in becomes the ultimate insurance policy for your career. In an unstable job market where roles are shifting, industries are evolving, and artificial intelligence is reshaping the way we work, the people who can point to their growth, adaptability, and initiative are the ones who stay relevant. Mastery isn't built on perfection; it's built on showing up consistently. So, when things get uncertain, and they will, the effort you've demonstrated becomes the strongest argument for your value. 

This is what it means to future-proof your career: to stop waiting for someone to tell you that you've done great and start proving it to yourself, as you go. Don't wait until the economy crashes, your role gets cut, or you're suddenly expected to do more with less, to start showing others what you're capable of. Track your progress. Build your confidence now and start taking ownership of your career. 

That means breaking big goals into micro-actions that fit into your actual life. Don't overthink it. You don't need a full day of 'deep work' to make a real difference. You can start with a ten minute window and a clear action. Progress doesn't require perfect conditions, but it means being intentional with your time. Choose to act, even when you don't feel ready, because it's far too easy to do nothing – and doing nothing over time is what makes us stagnant, unfulfilled, and replaceable. 

The truth is, the most dangerous career risk isn't failure – it's complacency. The moment you start thinking, you'll get to it later, or it doesn't matter right now, you're giving away the time you could be using to evolve. And, once you stop fixating on what you can't control and start doubling down on what you can, everything changes.

It's easy to get caught up in our mistakes and miss the quiet progress we're making every day. But, when we start gathering the evidence of our effort, using hidden moments to take intentional action, and focus on what's working, we build real momentum that moves us forward. Your career success doesn't hinge on perfection – it grows through small wins, steady effort, and the decision to believe in your progress, one step at a time.

And that's it for this episode of Stop Sabotaging Your Success. Remember to download your Guide to Gathering The Proof Of Your Capabilities at cindyesliger.com/podcast, episode one hundred and seventy-seven. 

Thank you to our producer, Alex Hochhausen and everyone at Astronomic Audio. Get in touch, I'm on Instagram @cindyesliger. My email address is info@cindyesliger.com. 

If you enjoy listening to this podcast, you have to come check out The Confidence Collective. It's my monthly coaching program where we dig a little deeper into what's holding you back in your career and we find the workarounds. We help you overcome the barriers and create the career you want. Join me over at cindyesliger.com/join. I'd love to have you join me in The Confidence Collective.  

Until next week, I'm Cindy Esliger. Thanks for listening.